Funny but Bad Luck

A good friend of mine from college always got herself into an awkward sexual situation.  Tiffany was such a sweet girl with good intentions.  She did like to partake in college parties and muckery.  Tiffany was usually the voice of reason out of all of us.  There are three stories of hers that always made me laugh.

Tiffany’s first time having sex was not the normal awkward situation.  It was summer time and she just graduated high school.  She was at a cabin party.  She had liked Brett since the seventh grade.  After five years, they were finally going to have sex.  He unfortunately was not a boy scout and did not come prepared for the occasion.  He did not have a condom.  He ran down to the kitchen to see what he could find for the situation.  It was almost like he took a page out of the movie ‘Booty Call.’  Brett found saran wrap.  He wrapped it around his dick like a condom.  Poor Tiffany had no clue what to do, so she went along with it.  Her first time was like she was being stuffed and wrapped as lefts overs to be put away in the fridge.

saran 2

All of us girls went to a college party off campus one night.  Andrew went up to Tiffany and told her to come outside with him.  He told her he had some weed to smoke.  She follows him outside the house.  Andrew went and stood by a tree.  She asked him where was the weed, so they could smoke it.  He reached down as if to go into his pocket.  Instead of reaching into his pocket, Andrew unzipped his pants and pulled his dick out.  Tiffany shrieked.  She said, “Oh my god!  That’s not weed!”  He thought he would get a blow job.  He forgot that Tiffany was not like that.  She wanted to puff on his weed not his peter puffer.  It ended with her running back into the house and telling us what happened.

A few of us ladies took a road trip to see my friends Cameron and Alex at their college.  We all went out drinking at the bars and went back to the guys’ house.  I wanted to hook Tiffany up with Alex.  I kind of nudged her into his room.  I went up to bed with Cameron.  Tiffany started fooling around with Alex.  He took her bra off and a piece of gum fell out.  She completely forgot that she put a piece of gum in her bra for later.  They both stopped and looked at it.  Alex then pulled his dick out and told her to suck it.  Tiffany did not find this very persuasive.  She told him she did not want to do the job for him.  He put on a porno and started jerking himself off in front of her.  She stayed in the room while he did it, so she had a place to sleep.  Alex did his thing with no shame.  Once again, Tiffany found herself in the twilight zone of awkward sexual situations.  She told us about it on the way home.  We never laughed so hard.

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