Don’t Shit Where You Eat

There are reasons you should not date someone you work with at the same company.  Not to mention in the same building.  This also pertains to the gym.  If it is somewhere you go on a routine basis, do not mix business with pleasure.  The problem is majority of dating does not last forever.  It will end.  It could end horribly for both people.  You typically want to avoid seeing that person.  You cannot avoid going to work.  If you avoid the gym, you are only hurting yourself.  It is a lose, lose situation.

It was sometime in spring 2008.  I saw this gorgeous man in the building I worked at in Southside.  I was not sure if he worked there or not.  I started seeing him in the lobby and elevators.  I went on a hunt for him one day with a coworker of mine.  We checked the second floor.  He was not there.  We checked the fourth floor.  Bingo!  We casually walked by his cubical to see his name.  We went back down to the third floor where we worked.  I looked Jim up in the email directory.  I was bold and emailed him.  I told him I had seen him around the office and wanted to invite him to happy hour after work.  Jim surprisingly said he would love to join us.

We hit it off.  A couple of weeks later I went back to his place with him.  Jim was even sexier without his clothes on.  It wasn’t amazing sex, but it was better than the sex I was having with my ex-boyfriend Gary.  Anything is better than a plain, unsalted rice cake.  It was around the third or fourth time we slept together and something different happened.  It was late at night and dark in the room.  We tore our clothes off.  I felt something cold on my thigh.  I sat up in the bed.  I said, “What the fuck is that?!”  Jim replied, “It’s a vibrator!”  I turned on the light next to his bed.  A pink vibrator was on my leg.  I had no idea what to say for a moment.  I asked him where it came from and why did he have it.  He said he thought women liked vibrators, so he bought one to keep next to his bed.  I freaked out on him.  I said I had no idea where it has been or who it has been in and I did not want that in me.  He replied to me saying, “It is clean.  I washed it in the dishwasher.”  Oh hell no.  Jim realized I was not on board with his random vibrator.  I told him I was not feeling good and had to go home.  I could not even look at him in the eyes.

It is one thing for someone to have their own toy and have their partner use it on them.  It is a completely different ballgame for someone to use their toy on someone else.  You do not know who they have used the toy on previously in their bedroom.  And who puts a sex toy in the dishwasher?!  I do not want my sex toy mixed in with my dirty dishes.  You do not shove food up in your vagina.  Well, some people have done that.  It may have been a cucumber that was in the refrigerator or a frozen hot dog in the freezer.  We all have those friends.  Those stories never end on a happy note.  I avoided going to the floor that Jim worked on.  If I saw him in the building, I turned and walked the other way.  It was awkward.  I learned why you should not shit where you eat.  I have followed that rule since I learned that lesson.

4 thoughts on “Don’t Shit Where You Eat

  1. Man alive… I couldn’t imagine bringing some sort of toy along to another’s house for enjoyment… Of course I don’t own any! You need to talk with you significant other if ramping up the sex life is appropriate in the first place… Man I’m sorry!


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