Drunk Subconscious

Have you ever struggled with what to do in a situation?  The inner debate within yourself.  There are plenty of times in life where the drunk you trumps the sober you.  It is similar to the angel and devil on each shoulder.  Who do you listen to?  Which one will win out?  

Aurora and Max had their friend in town.  I saw Aurora in a picture with this guy who caught my attention.  She told me it was their friend Oliver.  He was an attractive guy.  Aurora and Max had a feeling Oliver and I would vibe well.  They also know I do not do anything with strings attached to it.  This would have been a perfect situation for me.  

I was having people over at my house.  Aurora and Max brought Oliver and Jim to my place to party with us.  I totally dug Oliver’s vibe.  He was good people.  He was good-looking.  He did not live here.  I also received a side note about him.  *Oliver had a big dick*  It sounded like a great package deal.  I was drinking a lot that night.  At the end of the night, the sober, level-headed voice told me to have Oliver stay over and only sleep together.  You could tell a lot about a person by just sleeping with them in bed.  However, the drunk voice in my head told me to spread them legs and get it in.  Take one guess which voice won the argument?  Woof.

I wish I would have only slept in the same bed as him.  I would have realized having sex with him would be a bad idea.  Yes, he had a big dick, but it was not as big as my ex, Peter.  It was girth big.  The sex was okay.  It was nothing to write home about and I did not want to try it again.  

He thought I was shy in bed because he was trying to force me to dirty talk.  Never force anything.  It makes it very awkward and ruins the mood.  We just met and were having sex the same night.  It made me feel like Kevin Hart.  That is way too much to put your nasty on someone in the first night of meeting them.  Just shut up and fuck me.  As if it couldn’t get any worse, he was a cuddler.  Fack.  I barely got any sleep that night.  I was so uncomfortable.  I would try to scoot away from him because I have a king size bed.  He would either creep up behind me or pull me back to him. I needed space to sleep.  Jesus Mary and Joseph.  He started calling me gorgeous, baby and babe.  I loathe those terms when they are thrown around on a whim.


All of that left a bad taste in my mouth.  The more I reflected on it the more I realized that I messed up.  I did not want to be around him after that.  If I would have just slept in the same bed with him, it would still be cool for me to be around him.  I ruined it by having sex with him.  I felt even worse because I think so much of Aurora and Max.  I made sure not to be rude to him.  I played the fade, arms length type responses.  I did not want to lead him on since I noticed he was liking everything I posted on the book of faces.  

Oliver was good people.  He was better as just a friend though.  My best friend, Jude, told me that I must have the circus in-between my legs since after one time Oliver was clambering over me.  Don’t worry there is no bearded lady at this circus act.  

O.M.G. Facebook Official

Who started the trend on the emphasis for relationships on Facebook?

Do people really believe marking their territory on social media will help solidify their relationship?  Lezbehonest,  I doubt a Facebook official life event will help the cause if a ring and a marriage license does not deter people from straying.  Some people really believe if it is not on Facebook then it did not happen or it is not real.  No matter how many times you tag a person or upload pictures of you two together on social media will actually help your relationship in the long run.  There are people who do not care if someone has a boyfriend or a girlfriend.  They see something they want and will go after it.  There are also those people who have strong connections with someone and will end up cheating on their significant other.  It is really hard to fight chemistry connections.  It is also hard to teach an old dog new tricks.  The saying still holds some truth, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.”  Facebook will fail every time.

kermit annivI do enjoy watching people attempt to piss on their significant others on social media.  Everyone knows they are just a dog trying to mark their territory.  They want to make sure everyone knows their significant other is taken.  It truly is a joke.  I feel bad for these sad social media souls.  They want to brag about their amazing significant other.  They tend to forget that due to social media everyone knows their significant other has had three other girlfriends/boyfriends in a matter of eight months.  How special are you in that statistic?  Or do you only care about how many likes you can get?

The other fun aspect of Facebook for these people is broadcasting every detail of their relationship.  One day, I love him.  The next day, I hate him.  People are so excited for someone getting engaged or married.  They say it has been a long time coming for the couple.  Did everyone forget the ten break ups?  Or the cheating that occurred multiple times?  Or them dating other people for a year?  Or putting them on blast on social media?  Some people do pay attention to what is posted on social media.  They are not jealous of your significant other.  They are laughing at the clown car and circus you put on for show.